GEOGRAPHY CLASS: The teacher of the Earth Science class was lecturing on map reading. He spent almost half a day to the class explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes. Towards the end of the class, the teacher asked his students, ‘Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes’ north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes’ east longitude’. A student’s voice broke the confused silence, and volunteered, ‘I guess you would be eating alone, Sir.
SHREWD FARM OWNER: A plane full of politicians crashed on a farm. When the police arrived they could not see the victims of the crash, the police asked the farm owner what happened.
Farm owner: I buried all of them.
One of the police men asked with shock: ‘Are you sure they were all dead?’
Farm owner: Some were screaming, ‘We are still alive’. But I did not believe them. You know, these politicians. They always lie.
AN INTELLIGENT WIFE: A wife took her very ill husband to see the doctor. After the medical routine check-up, the Doctor confidentially told the wife: Give him healthy breakfast daily, be pleasant and in good, do not fight. Cook tasty dinner and do not discuss your problems with him. Stop watching TV shows, What’s App and Facebook. Do not demand for money or new jewels. If you can do this for one year, your husband will be okay.
On the way home, husband asks his wife: What did the doctor say?
Wife: Your survival is not possible.
LAST WISH: The Pope was dying. He sent a message for Vijay Mallya and Nirav Modi to come to the hospital in the Vatican. When they arrived, they were ushered up to his room. As they entered the room, the Pope held out his hands and motioned for them to sit on each side of the bed. The Pope grasped their hands, sighed contentedly, smiled and started at the ceiling. For a time, no one said anything.
Both Vijay Mallya and Nirav Modi were touched and flattered that the Pope would ask them to be with him during his final moments. They were also puzzled because he had never given any indication that he particularly liked either one of them. Finally, Mallya asked, ‘Father, why did you ask the two of us to come here?’ The Pope mustered all his strength and then said weakly, ‘Jesus died between two thieves, and that’s how I’d like to go to.’
SMART WIFE: A husband was sitting on a sofa next to his wife who was eating and typing on her phone. He heard his phone’s message tone coming from the kitchen from where he was charging it. He went to the kitchen and read a message from his wife saying ‘Please bring the salt and sugar bottles on your way back’. This shows women power.
Have a great laugh and enjoy these fun loving stories.