I read this wonderful Old Chinese Wisdom and the saying went something like this: ‘One can win over and influence people the best with gestures of kindness and compassion.’ The title ‘Win Over People with Kindness‘ is apt for the story that unfolds below:
‘A farmer in ancient China had a neighbor who was a hunter, and he owned these ferocious and poorly trained hunting dogs. They usually jumped over the fence frequently and chased the farmer’s lambs away. The poor lambs were very scared of these dogs. The farmer asked his neighbor many times in a mild way to keep his dogs in check, but this fell on deaf ears.
One day the dogs again jumped the fence, attacked and severely injured several of the lambs. The farmer had enough and went to town to consult a judge who listened carefully to the story and said: “I could punish the hunter and instruct him to keep his dogs chained or lock them up. But you would lose a friend and gain an enemy. Which would you rather have, friend or foe for a neighbor?”
The farmer replied that he preferred a friend. “Alright, I will offer you a solution that will keep your lambs safe, and also ensure that you still remain a friend of your neighbor’s.” Having heard the judge’s solution, the farmer agreed. Once at home, the farmer immediately put the judge’s suggestions to the test. He took three of his best lambs and presented them to his neighbor’s three small sons, who were besides themselves with joy and began to play with them.
To protect his son’s newly acquired playthings, the hunter built a strong kennel for his dogs and never left them loose. Since then, the dogs never again bothered the farmer’s lambs. Out of gratitude for the farmer’s generosity towards his sons, the hunter often shared the game he had hunted with the farmer. The farmer reciprocated by sending the hunter the cheese he had made. Within a short time, the neighbors became good friends.
A similar Western saying too goes like this: ‘One catches more flies with honey than with vinegar.’ Honey is so sweet that flies would definitely get attracted. In this same scenario, let us all make an effort to be more polite and loving when we speak to anyone who we meet in our journey of life and not make rude and sarcastic remarks at every opportunity we get especially with our families, friends and colleagues.
Let us all live amicably and let the lamp of our hearts be lit with the flame of pure love, joy and peace. Treat people the way you want to be treated. Be Humble like a blade of grass, more tolerant like a tree who is always eager to serve others and show them respect and gain their friendship. By lifting others up, we too soar higher.
Beautiful and meaningful story Kamal thank you for it.
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Oh thanks so much dear Susan for your beautiful thoughts and yes the story was so true a little kindness went a long way instead of showing animosity.
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Good story. Good message. Thanks.
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Hey thanks friend for your thoughts.
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How do you show kindness in a situation where someone else’s actions has caused so much damage to you? Is it not amicable to seek restorative measures for yourself? If you don’t, are you loving yourself especially when the culprits have shown you their stance by causing damage?
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There is no question that when the culprits have shown their animosity and cause damage one has to resort to such acts then what is the difference between you and him. Why cause more damage and get where. In these situations it is always best that one can win over people with kindness and compassion and it sure will take its time but one can surely win over people. Why do we want to live in a world of hate and rage. I know nothing is easy but these stories are trying to tell us what we can do in such situations.
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I’m not speaking in terms of showing rage. I’m speaking in terms of taking legal action to recover from damages. Is that the same as being vengeful or showing rage? If so, how? To me being vengeful would be try to defame someone’s character the same way mine was. Instead, I just want to recover damages. Showing rage is pick a fight of physically seeking to harm someone. Engage with me on your perspective.
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No no not at all why show rage but if you are talking from the legal point of view of recovering the damages that you have suffered then of course you have to go thru legal ways and I am not an authority on this. From my limited way I can just say that one can understand how you must be feeling and going thru but sometimes circumstances are such that you cannot do anything but wait and watch and let things be the way they are or see that these things had to come your way and there was a learning in this too and may be things may get better for you. May be what had to happen had to happen and now you can look over at the positive side of things. Sorry this is just my perception, I am not a legal expert. Can understand what you must have gone through and can sympathise with you too.
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Indeed correctly said and well portrayed the beautiful story!! A lovely message of peace and love given!! Your stories are always inspiring and gives a positive message Kamal. Reading your post early morning made my day !!
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Thanks so much dear Tanvir for these wonderful thoughts and yes they are and such great eye openers isnt it. Being kind and compassion is so good then being enemies and for what.
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Absolutely true a beautiful message in era where all need to understand this !!
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Yes Tanvir and at this times when things are going bad to worse.
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Amazingly written ,very inspiring story👌
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Thanks a lot, Priti.
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Thank you Kamal for this story so filled with wisdom and kindness. The situation could easily have descended in fights that would destroy both farms and men. Wish there were more wise judges like this about.
miriam
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Welcome Miriam for these great comments and yes so true the situation could have become worse but he listened to the judge’s advice and changed his ways. Yes hope we had such judges and not only in stories.
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Kindness always wins
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Yes absolutely true Jodi kindness always is a winner why must there be rage and anger. Thanks.
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an age old question indeed!
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Yes for sure
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Beautiful…though people often take your gentle behaviour as your weakness, still this is the best anyone can be.
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Thanks for your comments and yes will agree with u but yet being kind is better than fighting.
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Beautiful post. Amen to more kindness! No matter the circumstances. It changes everything for the better. 💖
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Thanks for the beautiful comment and yes Amen to kindness.
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💖💖
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Reblogged this on Die Erste Eslarner Zeitung – Aus und über Eslarn, sowie die bayerisch-tschechische Region!.
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Thanks dear Michael
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You lift my soul and light the way for us all. We are all in need of hope filled words on a daily basis.
Hoping you have many venues on which you have a variety of audiences.
Arlene
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Thanks so much Arlene for these amazing words. I feel so happy that u like these wonderful uplifting stories and will keep on doing so by His grace. Thank you and have a great day dear.
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I love this story. I really needed this today.
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Oh thank you so much Roach that this story could be of help to u today and sometimes they come at the right time.
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Thnk you so much for this post.. I was having a hard time.. but I think after reading this I have found a solution to my problem.. the best line was “treat everyone in the same manner you want to be treated”.. thanks a lot again ..
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Thanks for your great comments and yes these beautiful stories come at the right time we want them to. Yes and if u treat people the way u want them to u too will be treated that way. All is out attitude. Welcome friend
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Thanks
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Welcome
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That’s a very good story full of wisdom. Thank you for telling it.
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Thanks for your great comments and yes such a wonderful story on kindness
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What a beautiful story..thanks for sharing this
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Welcome Kalyan
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Awesome post 😃 Kindness is so important
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Thanks and yes it sure is there is nothing more than kindness shown towards one and all.
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Your welcome 😃 Yes so true
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Thanks.
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Another really lovely post, Kamal. An excellent story to be sure. I have always tried to live my life like this – makes everything much easier.
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Thanks Robbie for your kind words and yes these stories are so beautiful and eye openers. It is so nice to live by kindness than by rage and anger.
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Beautiful share on kindness Kamal 🌼
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Welcome Savvy for your great comments
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Excellent. Moralistic and quite true. Keep up the good work. I write. I would love your feedback on my blog do check it out https://iamgayatriblog.wordpress.com
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Thanks for your great comments Gayatri and will definitely have a look at your blog
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The story has the sweetness!
Things can be won without arguments too. 🙂 A very nice story. Enjoyed reading this one. 🙂
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Thanks Prakash for your comments and yes so true these stories talk so much about goodness and kindness. They r eye openers.
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True. Pleasure is all mine.. 🙂
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Welcome.
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A wonderful message passed on.
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Thanks Moushmi.
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Hi Kamal, I keep missing your wounderful post the wordpress reader !
Are you safe in the crazy rain in mumbai ?
PS please read my blog – because there is a nice suprise for you !!!
Regards Bella
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Oh Hi Bella yes in this crazy rain it was horrible and there were lot of people who suffered and no place to go home too but luckily nowadays people are very supportive and many stayed back at offices. I stay very near my office and so I did not have a lot of problem. Thanks so much dear Bella for your kind words. Ya will definitely go and have a look right now.
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Did you get home then? I work with many in our Powai office and some sent pictures of train stations … it so bad.
Glad you are safe.
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Ya ya so many people have got lost, so many lost their lives and trains stations were horror scenes and roads all jammed with floods everywhere. I stay in South Mumbai which is pretty safe and we are not having so many problems like our suburbs which is built recently so when no infrastructure is done all have to suffer. Sad situation and this is life in short, Bella we are all left at the mercy of our politicians. Even we received so many pictures and everyday our newspapers are full of these stories. Sorry for people who lose their lives and have to go to so much trouble.
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Yes india and corruption it is sooo sad.
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Yes Bella but cannot help it have to live where we are born. You know He says this is all my divine plan, you just take my name and do not worry. All this is a one big giant wheel and merry go around, so we have to simply watch and feel sad for our fellow beings and as He says keep the faith and be at peace within and enjoy life which is so beautiful and best though of course very easy to talk but with daily practice and reading such wonderful books, meditation, stories learn to understand Him.
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“Be Humble like a blade of grass, more tolerant like a tree who is always eager to serve others and show them respect and gain their friendship.”
Well said…. 👍👍
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Thanks Umer for your comments and yes such powerful words it so touched me that I thought it was so apt with this story. Have a great day dear.
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“Build me a son, O Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak, and brave enough to face himself when he is afraid, one who will be proud and unbending in honest defeat, and humble and gentle in victory. ”
Words from a prayer by General Douglas MacArthur.
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Great and such true words Umer and for sure they are like a prayer and the Lord would be so happy to have a son like that. Beautiful, thanks so much.
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Welcome…
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Thanks
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A great story and a great message from a great blogger! Thankyou x
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Hey thanks so much dear Wendy for your great comments. Have a great day.
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Thanks so much and I hope you have a brilliant day too! x
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Thanks Wendy.
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Beautiful message. Thanks for the share Kamal.
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Welcome Sumith.
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Ahh, I had a forgotten what it was like to read your analogies.
Happy, sweet, and memorable.
🙂
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Hey thanks so much for your kind words Nam.
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It’s always a reminder that one must stick on” treat others the way you expect back from them”
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Yes absolutely true and treat all the way with kindness to get back kindness
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Wonderful stories, Kamal! And such beautiful lessons to remember.
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Thanks Maggie for your comments and yes so true these stories have great lessons for all of us
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Absolutely love this Kamal and you always inspire a variety of options to ponder. Thank you for sharing. 💙🦋
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Welcome Rhapsody for your superb words. Ya these varieties of options are so apt with the story too. Being kind is so nice.
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This is beautiful, I really enjoyed the read, I have always enjoyed Oriental Philosophy especially Chinese Philosophy. I am going to reblog this article for you.
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Thanks and yes old Chinese philosophies are so wonderful to read and they have so much to tell us like Zen, Buddhism and Tao De Ching. Awesome reads.
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Reblogged this on Truth Troubles.
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Thanks once more and such wonderful and true stories of life and their moments. They are eye openers in themselves.
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Thank you for this wonderful message. It is peace and positivity all the way. Peace and Blessings
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Such a lovely post!
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Thanks Caitlin
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A wonderful positive message to everyone. Thank you.
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Thanks Barbara for your kind words.
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🙂☺
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Wow! This story came to me at the right time. Read it to my teens who listened to it with rapt attention which was great. Teens need constant reminders to be kind. Thank you.
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Thanks for the beautiful comment Smitha and yes I so agree with you they sure require these types of stories to make them understand life.
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kindness is amazingly strong
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Thanks and yes kindness is always great.
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Nice
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Thanks Tarun
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I love stories, thank you for sharing this. Kindness is so many things… Today I was the recipient of two act of kindness. It was such a blessing. The question asked above about how does one show kindness to those who’ve hurt us is one I’ve asked myself. Sometimes I think walking away from hurtful people is the kindest thing to do, for ourselves, and for them. It’s a way to stay at peace. Sometimes space allows time to think, heal, etc. Stories get people thinking about tough topics. Again, thank you 🙏🏻
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Yes absolutely true and agree totally with your words. Sometimes we need to give space and time to people all will be good in the end. Being kind to people is so good it comes back to us too. These stories are eye openers in themselves for us, Leila. Thanks dear.
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Blessings Kamal! 😊
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Same to u too Leila.
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I love this. I would have liked to reblog but no reblog button.
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Thanks oh k actually I too don’t understand so I too do not reblog anyone post
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I always do this..
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Great keep it up
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I sure will..
I love this blog cos we both have a lot in common, My name is Also Blessing.
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Oh wow awesome and so nice to be hearing this wonderful name. Blessings to you dear from the Lord
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Thank you so much..
Amen, and God bless you more ❤❤
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Thanks dear
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❤❤
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