-I find it ironic that the colors red, white and blue stand for freedom, until they are flashing behind you at the back of cars.
-The last thing I want to do is hurt you in a most horrible way, but it is still on my bucket list. I will surely have my way.
-My mind isn’t twisted and perverted, its strategically bent and curved in a precarious way in several places.
-Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak and cause fools of themselves.
-Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit- salad and spoiling its awesome taste.
-To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
-I’m great at multi-tasking, I can waste time, be unproductive and procrastinate all at once.
-Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are pretty sexy.
– Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity because I am allergic and break out in sarcasms.